As of right now I am 19.5 weeks pregnant. For those of you not familiar with pregnancy measurements, that is about 4.5 months as 20 weeks marks the "half way" point. I'm not exactly sure where the last 4 months went as they seem like a blur. I'm super excited for the next 4 months though as I'm sure they will be full of changes and excitement!
I guess I'll start with the best news first. I am FINALLY starting to get over the notorious morning sickness. The first 4 months were almost unbearable at times and I just kept praying that I would return to feeling like my normal self soon. I knew I was pregnant before we even tested because it was the only thing that would explain my symptoms. The sick feeling hit at about 7 weeks and just barely subsided at week 18 or so. Things got worse before they got better, although I was "lucky" because on average I only threw up ever other day instead of multiple times a day like some. I had no appetite and could only take the smallest sips of water at times. This resulted me losing at least 15 pounds (from my pre-pregnancy weight) and consequently having little energy to do anything. I still have moments where I have to sit down and take deep breaths to make it through moments of nausea but I'm glad that stage of my pregnancy appears to be over. It was both physically and emotionally draining to feel so crappy.
The best part about starting to feel better is that I am finally able to feel excitement about the baby! The honest truth is that it was hard to feel anything while sitting on the couch staring at the wall trying not to move. I felt guilty for not being more excited or wanting to even think about baby stuff like names/shopping/etc. But that is no longer the case! I have been scouring the internet every night comparing baby gear and loving it. Yikes, there is a lot of stuff to look into and buy but seeing all the things makes it all feel more real and I love that.
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| Baby foot picture just for fun |
The equally best part about feeling better is being able to be myself again. Brett did such a great job of taking care of me and the baby and the house and everything else for the last 4 months. I felt so useless. I have been working as a nanny about 30 hours a week and any energy I had was spent driving and caring for other families. I am now able to help make dinners again and even did the dishes tonight. We have also been able to go on dates again and laugh together. When I was feeling sick I did not want to talk or even think which made me quite the poor companion. Its so good to be back and to see my husbands eyes light up again when we hang out. I really got a good one with him!
Part of feeling better is a return of my appetite. I can finally eat again without it being completely miserable. I still have to eat slow and regularly and can't even think about lying down after I eat, but it is better. Its fun to be able to enjoy food again instead of it always feeling like a chore. Thanks to this appetite I have finally started gaining weight, albeit slowly.
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| Baby ultrasound at 15 weeks |
Despite my loss of appetite and weight loss the little babe inside of me has been growing strong and looks healthy at the doctor appointments. My belly is growing slowly but surely. Personally, I've noticed it getting tighter and tighter but the pictures can't really show that. My "baby belly" is really long and starts up high and goes down low. I look the most pregnant in dresses that can show the whole length without cutting it in half. Also shirts/dress that are tight up high help show it off. Despite the lack of growth outward I can tell something is growing inside because of how tight it all feels. Brett likes to press on my tummy because it feels so different and is a physical reminder that there is a baby inside. I'm not doctor, but I think I can even tell where the baby is sometimes because of how it all feels from the outside.
I was less than diligent about taking photographs because I didn't see much change. You can see a little bump if you look close, but lets be honest, who doesn't have a little bump. I didn't think it was anything special back then (partially due to the constant mood I was in) but now I'm loving every little growth.
I'm still wearing all my regular clothing without a problem but I am getting bigger every day and am sure that won't last forever. I bought a number of maxi style dresses in preparation for my belly and got some capris and a few shirts from the maternity section while in Utah. I'm excited to be showing more fully but am appreciating being able to get the most out of my current wardrobe.
One question I get asked lots is if I've felt the baby kick yet. I never know how to answer this question. Because I was so sick and felt uncomfortable in my stomach area for so long, it was impossible to feel anything else. Over the last 2 weeks I have started feeling less of the constant nausea but still feel gassy all the time. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I don't know what the baby would feel like yet. There are "movements" that are definitely digestion related but then other than are not so clear. At risk of giving too much information, I've been trying to monitor more closely what I feel but it is so often accompanied by pressure and a release of gas that I can't honestly say it was the baby. However, there have also been more prolonged periods of "movement" and I wouldn't be surprised if it was half digestion related and half baby related. I know the little thing is in there somewhere and also wonder sometimes if its movements increase the pressure/gas, who really knows. What I do know that I'll be feeling the kicks soon enough and that I should enjoy the peace while I can.
Overall, things are really good right now and I am just so happy finally. We have another doctor appointment on wednesday and are excited to confirm that things are still going well. We should be finding out the gender but due to some insurance changes it will be our first appointment with a new doctor so I'm not sure if they got them memo and are planning on it or not. Either way, we should know soon if its gonna be a little Brett or little Kirsten. So that will be the next big announcement.
And to end with some fun pictures.....Both yesterday and today Brett felt like my outfit showed off my belly so we took more pictures but when I look at them on the computer they just don't do it justice. Oh well, they are what they are. Enjoy!
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| This is my view and when I look down I am always surprised by how big I look! |
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| My official 19 week picture |
